The Love of the Father
When is the first time that "love" is used in the Bible?
One of the causes of the boy crisis in our culture is dad deprivation. We have talked about this in several of our past articles.
But what are some of the reasons that this bond is so important in the life of a child?
Recently, I was doing a study of the names of God and came across the origin story for Jehovah Jireh, “The God Who Provides.” It’s the story of Abraham and Isaac as told in Genesis 22. I’ve read it many times. But I stumbled across a commentary that said that this is the first time in the Bible that the word love is used.
Then God said, “Take your son, your only son, whom you love—Isaac—and go to the region of Moriah. Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on a mountain I will show you.” Gen 22:2
The Hebrew word is ‘ahab’ and is used over 200 times in the Old Testament. It is mostly used in Psalms and Proverbs but appears fifteen times in Genesis.
This is the FIRST time it appears in the Bible. Perhaps I make more of it than I should because it suits my purposes. But, at a minimum, it’s interesting, isn’t it?
The first time the Bible talks about love is the love a father has for a son.
And isn’t that the story of the Bible? THE Father had A Son whom He loves very much. It resonates throughout the story arc of the Bible.
I also find it interesting that there was always a son who was declared ‘loved’ by the patriarchs:
Gen 22:2 (above…Abraham loved Isaac. Note that this is God saying ‘your only son, Isaac, whom you love’. Abraham also had a son named Ishmael. But God doesn’t recognize him here as a son of Abraham.)
Gen 25:28. Isaac loved Esau. (But God loved Jacob.)
Gen 37:3, Jacob loved Joseph more than he did any of his other sons, because Joseph was born when Jacob was very old. (Despite the fact that Jacob had ten other sons at the time.)
The word used in all three cases is ahab.
In The Art of Manliness, Brett McKay wrote an article entitled “The Importance of Fathers (According to Science). He lists the following advantages of a loving father’s influence in a child’s life:
Less likely to live in poverty
Do better in school
Less likely to go to jail
Less likely to do drugs or alcohol
Less likey to be sexually active as teens
Less likely to be obese
More likely to take healthy risks
The science and statistics are there, but you already know that’s true, don’t you?
Today’s culture goes as far as saying that a father isn’t even necessary in a family. In an article in The Atlantic by Pamela Paul, she states,
As Stacey and Biblarz point out, our ideas of what dads do and provide are based primarily on contrasts between married-couple parents and single-female parents: an apples-to-oranges exercise that conflates gender, sexual orientation, marital status, and biogenetic relationships in ways that a true comparison of parent gender—one that compared married gay-male couples or married lesbian couples to married heterosexuals, or single fathers to single mothers—would not. Most of the data fail to distinguish between a father and the income a father provides, or between the presence of a father and the presence of a second parent, regardless of gender.
Pamela concludes that single mothers are better parents than single fathers and that the best parents according to the data are lesbian mothers.
You can also find many opinions that differ from Pamela, thankfully. The general feminist opinion is that woman can raise children fine by themselves. Many do, to their credit but probably not by their choice and I applaud them for doing so when things don’t work out in the marriage. I hope they are able to find strong men in an extended family or through their church community to help them to raising socially, well-adjusted sons and daughters.
But we’re not concerned about the feminist view here. We’re concerned about the child’s view. Two parents are generally better than one and a man and a woman are the optimum combo. Guess God got it right after all in his design for the family.
One of the clear advantages a father has as a parent is to introduce a child to the ‘Father-heart’ of God. God is portrayed as a father, a heavenly Father, and God has given man the responsibility on this earth to introduce that idea…for better or worse…to a child. Our initial on ramp to the personhood of God comes to us through our Fathers.
Sociologists say it's common for people to perceive that God is like the fatherly figures in their lives. If dad is caring, patient and concerned then children will believe God has those same characteristics. And the opposite holds true when a father is harsh, judgmental or absent.
"A father has a powerful influence in deep and subtle ways," said David Dollahite, a professor of Family Life at Brigham Young University. "Even though children know intellectually that God is fair, loving and kind and patient, it’s hard for them to relate to God at a gut level in a deep way if their own father is not that way."
The Chosen
In the movie, “The Chosen”, we see a flashback scene of Jesus as a child with his father, Joseph. Joseph is working with him in the carpentry shop. It’s a wonderful scene that shows the love of an earthly father with his son. The playful banter, teaching, and physical touches between them are delightful to see. The Bible gives us absolutely no more to go on about these years than “Jesus grew in wisdom, stature, and favor with both God and man.” Imagine what you will, but there’s no way in my mind that that is accomplished without both a loving Heavenly Father and a loving earthly father. I am reminded that Joseph was chosen by God to raise His son; His only son; a begotten son raised by another man who was called for such a purpose. In every way, Joseph was a loving father too. Despite that fact that Jesus existed since the beginning of the world, we know he ‘emptied himself of his glory’ and became a baby in THIS world and needed an earthly father to point him in the right direction.
In the movie, “The Nativity”, Oscar Isaac plays Joseph. On the journey, Mary and Joseph share this conversation:
Mary: Yes. Do you ever wonder when we'll know?
Joseph: Know what?
Mary: When he is more than just a child. Will it be something he says? A look in his eyes?
Joseph: I wonder if I will even be able to teach him anything.
“I wonder if I’ll be able to teach him anything.” What a perfectly telling line that any father would say. And yet, this is the way of all mankind since the beginning of time. God instituted marriage and family and then inserted his ONLY SON into that perfect framework to be raised for his mission.
We are God’s children. We are His son’s and daughters. He is our Father. Despite the attempt of militant feminists and woke ideologies, God is portrayed as masculine even though no one has ever seen him. (I wonder if God has an issue with personal pronouns?) His relationship with us has always been characterized by love. Tolerance is NOT love. God hates sin and for good reason. It separates him from us and he loves us. Tolerating what the Bible calls sin is NOT loving a person. Dignity and respect are things we can extend to every human being because they are made in God’s image. However, we should not and can not celebrate or advocate for what we interpret in God’s Word as being sin.
You’re A Good Father
A popular worship song by Chris Tomlin captures this notion so well. In his song “Good, Good Father”, the chorus goes:
You’re a good, good father that’s who you are; that’s who you are
And I’m loved by you. That’s who I am; that’s who I am.
No greater word than love captures the father heart of God. God is LOVE
So, we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. 1 John 4:16
In summary, we hoped to share some insight into what the Bible says is the essence of the father-child bond: Love. Having a loving father in a home provides the best chance you have statistically to raise children to be socially well-adjusted and responsible, loving adults. God created the nuclear family in the beginning and entrusted his own son to be placed in such a home. Even though Jesus’ father died before Jesus turned 30, we can assume that Joseph was available for the majority of Jesus’ teen years and was very much involved in his son’s maturation into adulthood. Also a loving father in the home is the first glimpse a person will get of a Loving Father in heaven. For better or worse, this is God’s plan for raising sons and daughters. Only a man can affirm masculinity or manhood in a boy. When women try they produce a counterfeit or effeminate masculinity. Woman can only arouse masculinity in men; not affirm it. Leave that to the men.
Until next time -
Train. Disciple. Encourage.