Divine Guidance In Parenting

Lessons from Manoah, Solomon, and the Biblical Path to Raising Children"

I’m currently studying the book of Judges.

I came across a story in chapter 13 that I had never remembered reading before.  Reading the Bible can be like that!

In recounting the events surrounding the birth of Samson,  a woman is visited by an angel of the Lord who told her that though she was sterile and had never before conceived a child, it would come to pass that she would bear a son who was to begin the deliverance of Israel from the hands of the Philistines.

When the angel had left her, she went to tell her husband, Manoah, exactly what the angel had said.  Manoah’s response was to pray to God:

“O Lord, I beg you, let the man of God you sent to us come again to teach us how to bring up the boy who is to be born.”

That is a striking prayer.  

We are not told if the man had other wives or children, but he certainly sounds like a first-time father.   Later, Manoah actually meets the angel of the Lord who delivered the message to his wife.  His question to the angel is, again, very telling:

“When your words are fulfilled, what is to be the rule for the boy’s life and work?”

Let’s begin with the obvious:  These are great prayers for parents to pray when they are having children.  “Teach us what we are to do…”

It is interesting that the angel answers Manoah’s first prayer by returning to speak to Manoah.  My only interpretation is to suggest that Manoah wanted to make sure that his wife heard EVERYTHING the angel had said.   In Scripture, most people who come face to face with angels are fearful because the angel’s first words to them are “Don’t be afraid.”  We know that the sight was fearful to Manoah’s wife because she describes the angel with a Hebrew word that means ‘terrible’, ‘dreadful’, or ‘fearful’.   So, the angel returns but does NOT answer Manoah’s prayer about how to raise the boy other than to reiterate what he told the wife, who had gotten it right the first time!

Why do you think there’s not a blueprint in the Bible for raising children (boys)?  I would suggest that every blueprint would be as different as the children themselves.   Proverbs 22:6 says “Raise up a child in the way that they should go and when they are old, they will not depart from it.”  This may be one of the most misunderstood passages in the Bible and one that I’m not fully prepared to address here.  But first and foremost, it is not a promise of God.  It’s just another general rule of thumb.  There have been way too many parents who have taken this passage as gospel truth and then blamed themselves or blamed God when their children didn’t turn out like they wanted.  

Psalm 127 is one of the Psalm of Ascents or songs that were sung by pilgrims on their way to Jerusalem for a gathering feast.  We are told that it was written by Solomon:

Unless the Lord builds the house; it’s builders labor in vain.